Day 12 - still down 11 lbs, no weight loss today BLAH!

I've been more hungry than usual the last couple of days but today isn't too bad; then again I've stayed busy and took a walk. I didn't even eat my second fruit last night, so I'm really disappointed that I didn't lose anything today! Maybe tomorrow (sigh!) I will definitely be eating my fruit today though! I walked by the fruit stand on my walk and oh my gosh, I'd LOVE to eat one of those peaches! Just one! Please! Oh but I can't defile the diet so maybe I can get some to freeze; but everyone knows there is nothing like eating a fresh peach, ARGHH! Although this is "painful", it still supports my theory that all of these "cravings" are MENTAL and not actual hunger and I really don't like that my mind causes me to want food that my body really shouldn't have (oh but it tastes SO good!, see there it goes again!) I am hoping that after this diet I will not want to go eat every single yummy thing out there and will be able to choose better foods; I love all kinds of foods, not just sweets, in fact, the only sweet that I can't resist is ice cream; not cakes or pies or cookies, although if you put cookies out, I will eat some. Anything small that you can grab and eat real fast is a downfall for me when I'm hungry; I will need to learn to keep celery, etc in the house for snacks and that will help.

I don't know what today's food plan is; I'm thinking maybe cabbage and chicken? I love cabbage and I got some at the Sunflower Farmers Market yesterday.

Yesterdays food was: these really thin eye of round steaks that cook up in a minute with fresh tomatoes. My fruit was an orange. (Lunch)

I ate celery on the way to the temple; at home I made a mahi mahi fillet cooked with the tomatoes (jenn ate those); I ate my crackers but bought some different ones with the same calories that was recommended on another HCG diet site (maybe that was the difference in not losing weight? Maybe it has more salt? Although salt is allowed without any specific limits) Did not end up eating my fruit after because I was full and it was getting late.

I don't have as much weight to lose as Jenn so I can expect to lose at a slower rate; but a half pound would be nice every day to keep me encouraged. We'll see what tomorrow brings!

Day 3 - weight down 1.5 lbs

Now how in the world do you lose weight after eating that insane amount of fattening food? I still think that is water weight though because I had gained 4 lbs overnight when I weighed on Thursday (I've been weighing every day since last Monday in preparation for this) So I'm actually still 1.5 lbs over what I weighed on Tuesday & Wednesday; until I break that threshhold, I'm not attributing any loss to the diet plan.

I was up way too early this morning, 6am; usually I will go back to sleep until about 8 but I got up today to start doing laundry, cleaning, checking email, doing this, haha. So I am already hungry, dang it! But it's not bad YET and I could still eat an apple or a melba toast but I don't think I'll worry about it until lunch; just kinda wish I'd slept more because I'm going to be tired and grumpy later! I need to go do the shot soon though; I'm going to try to do it about 8:30 am every day. I plan to stay very busy to be sure I don't start focusing on hunger and food. I hope my house will get very clean today!

I saved some steak from last night for lunch or dinner today and it weighed a bit under 3oz; a tiny bit smaller than I would normally eat so not bad; I think I probably normally eat about 4 oz of meat. I never weighed or measured portions ever before so this is a learning experience.

Day 1

OK, I'm really brave; I gave myself the shot this morning. Yep, I did it! Took me awhile to get courage though. Kind of touched my leg with the needle and felt the little poke and thought "nope, can't do this; I'll get Jenn to do it for me" then I decided I should at least try. Seriously, did not hurt though, haha, probably too much fat there. Just that little prick at the skin; a pinch would have hurt much worse. So I can do this part of it, no problem!

Now we're supposed to "load" this weekend. This will be harder mentally than the 500 calorie diet later. I've spent years keeping myself from eating those kinds of food too much; obviously, I'm not thin so I'm not great at self control but still... I don't buy a LOT of foods because I know if it's in the house I'll eat it. And I don't have anyone in the house that would eat sweets if I brought them in. Tim will eat certain things, a little bit only though. So when I was at Costco, I was looking at some of those goodies that I never buy unless we're having a big gathering of some sort, then I can try a piece and everyone else can eat the rest. Still couldn't buy any of them and think of eating more than one piece. So I'll go shopping with Hans today and get him to help pick out some high calorie goodies for tomorrow after church.

Hans got up and offered to make me a huge breakfast of whatever I wanted: stacks of pancakes, bacon, eggs, hashbrowns, whatever. It sounded so awful. I had my usual bowl of Quaker oat squares or whatever those are called. But I did fill my bowl, haha! And I drank a glass of OJ which I usually don't do; I almost never drink anything with calories except OJ with our big breakfast on sunday. You'd think I'd be thin with all the worrying I do about foods, haha!

I'm thinking Krispy Kreme might be on our agenda today. If I need calories, that's one of the best places to find them!

WEIGHT - I'm actually pretty water logged right now for some reason. Definitely retaining water. Gained 4 lbs yesterday from the day before; I had started weighing last monday just for reference and had pretty much been the same each day, then that gain. We had bought some doughnuts in Kaysville (mmmm, the absolutely best double blueberry doughnuts ever!) and then Jenn brought over some doughnuts from Macy's and I nibbled here and there on those too. So maybe all those carbs? But I can feel the tightness in my fingers, etc so I know it's a water problem. Down 1 lb today though, even though I ate blueberry muffins from Costco last night with Hans' primary class that was here for dinner. Probably would be down the whole 4 lbs if I hadn't eat them. Shoud have saved them for today and tomorrow!

In any case, starting weight is to be determined today, but I want to keep in mind that I feel like I am actually 3 lbs over my "actual" starting weight because of retention.

You have to weigh yourself every morning and keep track. You can gain weight during these first two "load" days (duh!) which seems so WRONG to me, but OK, I said I'd do it and I will.